Stardate: 45020.4. Picard suspects a Romulan influence in the recent Klingon civil war, and must force the Federation to intervene before the Empire collapses.
Coincidentally on the very same day Lydia has doubts about her own beauty, the great beast Thing Thong, who steals beautiful things because he feels he is himself ugly, kidnaps her. While Lydia helps Thong find confidence in himself, Beetlejuice tries to 'save' her in the guise of the famed adventurer Grimdiana Bones.
Nick's control of the Russo household is undermined when he ex-father-in-law visits.
Julia thinks she's ready to resume dating, but Alison disagrees, questioning the manliness of Julia's new beau. Meanwhile, Allison and Anthony continue to bicker about who owns Suzanne's house, until Anthony obtains an affidavit asserting his right to occupy the house -- and allows Allison to stay on only as her personal servant.
The women begin to feel guilty about having abandoned the men naked in the woods. (Part 2 of 2)
During a party for Mr. Bracken, Herman drinks a bit too much and gets in over his head when he has to give a speech praising his boss.
Roger begins pestering Patti to help him with his book report, and when Patti finally loses her temper and yells at Roger to leave her alone, they get punished with a trip to detention. This doesn't sit well with Doug, who tries to stop Roger from bugging Patti. First appearance of Quailman
Doug feels inferior because he doesn't have awesome new shoes, Sky Davis Inflatable Air Jet, like everyone else. That is, until he meets the real Sky Davis.
Gibby informs the crew that they are all fired, just to soften the blow that there will not be bonuses (not really fired). Martin is talked into a nickel and dime porker game with his co-workers. They play in Martin's apartment. Expecting pizza, Martin finds Gibby at the door. Carter, the brown nose, had told Gibby about the game. Gibby lays down a large pile of $100s (the firm is doing financially badly, not him). All but Martin want to play high stakes, until Martin sees his cards. After losing big ($12,000), Gibby starts betting vacation days. Eventually clothing and household appliances get bet.
Former policeman Wallace Evans, now a professor, challenges Jessica to a race to solve a series of muggings on campus, and the muggings soon escalate to murder.
Sketches include Pee Wee's Adult Adventure / Crown Heights Story / Misery II / Homey D Clown Part 2 Of 2 / The Head Detective
Al builds a private room for himself, using the Bundy hammer. Meanwhile, Bud starts going by "Grandmaster B," but nobody can remember his nickname right.
When unemployed trumpet player Joey can't pay his gambling debts, he begs his older brother for a thousand-dollar loan. Roc refuses to come to the rescue, even though Joey promises to change. As a test, Roc gets Joey a legitimate job with the sanitation department, and promises to pay the debt if Joey can keep the job for two weeks.
The Major invites the Buckets for a golfing weekend at a luxury hotel. All is well until Onslow and Daisy turn up unexpectedly to collect Rose after she has spent a raunchy weekend away with a Mr Smith. Inevitably, when Hyacinth realises her family are there, she fears for her social standing. Adding to her dilemma is the amorous intentions of the Major.
To make a fast buck from a trash strike, Sly Sludge steals an untested microbe from Gi's scientist hero, Dr. Helix. It was supposed to be a technological fix for the problem of overflowing landfills, but it simply absorbs trash to become a city-devouring garbage blob. The blob must be stopped before it grows out of control.
The gang is forced to choose between supporting Kelly's relationship with Jeff and helping Zack cope with his grief over their break up, while Lisa plans her sweet sixteen party.
Zack bets Carosi that if he wins a volley ball game, Zack can buy Carosi's car. But Zack's team seems to be short handed when the star player is injured.
Alex plans a birthday bash for Evan; Georgie fears tippling Teddy will cause trouble; Frankie is torn between business and pleasure.
In the frozen tundra of the Arctic Polar Cap, Krang rants and raves that Rocksteady and Bebop will not return in time with the Bindex 3 to load the mutagen into the rocket ship's fuel tanks before lift off. Krang' plans turn all the City's inhabitants into horribly disfigured mutants from the vapor trails of the fuel used to lift the rocket.