Crichton must seek out an old friend who has gained too much knowledge about wormholes.
After the toy company is taken over by a tobacco company, Peter is set up as the president and is sent to Washington to lobby against a bill.
Cartman inherits one million dollars from his grandmother, fulfilling his lifelong dream of owning his own amusement park, Cartmanland A hemorrhoid erupts in Kyle's ass when he learns of Cartman's undeserved fortune, making him question the very existence of God, and whether there's a reason to stay alive in a world where someone like Cartman is happy.
It is Tim's 30th birthday - he receives a card from Dawn and an unusual inflatable gift from Lee. More importantly, however, it's Quiz Night and there are reputations to be made or lost.
Miranda finds out from Aidan that Steve has testicular Cancer. She has lunch with Steve and screams at him for being so nonchalant about his cancer, causing him to break down and cry. Carrie prepares for a trip to Aidan's country cabin in Suffern, NY with a true city girl's trepidation. She tells the girls she's going because Aidan loves the country. Charlotte understands, adding that she's going to Bunny's Connecticut house to please Trey. When Carrie gets to Aidan's extra rustic cabin, she immediately laments not being in the city. She realizes that relationships are inevitably a series of compromises and asks: When does the art of compromise become compromising? Unable to stand it anymore, Carrie returns to New York and goes out for a steak with Big. Big tells her he's dating a movie star and that he might be in love. Carrie decides to go back to Aidan's and recruits Samantha to provide some entertainment. Samantha has a hard time in the great outdoors until she spots a hunky farmer. She approaches "Young McDonald" to borrow some milk and gets a lesson in how to milk a cow and then some. Carrie tries to embrace the country and gets to work on baking Aidan a pie. But when a squirrel scares her, she drops the piecrust and admits to Aidan that she hates the house. Over in Connecticut, Charlotte is busily monitoring her fertility. Looking for Trey, she walks in on him taking a bath with his mother sitting nearby. She's disturbed but when her ovulation beeper goes off, she and Trey get to work in Bunny's prized orchid greenhouse. Back in the city, Miranda invites Steve over for take-out Chinese but her pitying behavior pisses off Steve. Still, he thanks her for being a bitch the other day because it motivated him to see a good doctor and schedule surgery. Miranda is by Steve's side when he awakes after his operation. Carrie goes home after compromising with Aidan. He'll install A/C and she'll brave the bugs and dirt every now and then.
A divorced woman meets an unfortunate end while partying with her friends, and the family discusses renting out the home to a seniors' dancing group.
Space Ghost overhears Zorak saying he's going to kill him and pouts, declaring he's never doing the show again. After Space Ghost leaves, guest Dave Thomas takes over as host, to the delight of Zorak and Moltar. However, Space Ghost keeps curiously poking back into the studio after some people he tries to make friends with reject him.
Just when Nitz thinks he has college life in the bag, he finds out that nobody recognizes him from first semester. When he tries and fails--miserably--to reinvent himself, he shuts himself up in his room and is dubbed by his fellow students as "Room Guy." Meanwhile, Cal discovers that there's an "I Hate Cal" website directed at him and seeks self-improvement advice from Rocko, which backfires on both of them.
A defrosted Holmes teams with a robotic Watson and a female Inspector Lestrade to stop the criminal rampage of Moriarty's clone.
After an alien seed takes root in an old woman's garden, it sucks the life from her and becomes a beautiful woman who continues to look for more victims.
When SG-1 flees from an expedition with Col. O'Neill and some mysterious team member named, Tyler, whom no one else knows about, stranded, the fitness of the team is questioned.
With no news of Rupert, little Neville runs away to Ireland. Meanwhile, Louise falls victim to her father once again.
Thrown into a distant part of the universe, an Earth astronaut finds himself part of a fugitive alien starship crew.
The Griffin family learns Brain has gone to Hollywood. After trying out on Kids Say the Darndest Things, Stewie awarded an appearance, and the Griffin get a free trip to Los Angeles. Brian doesn't want the family to know what he's really doing in Hollywood, and tries to cover it up.
In the grand tradition of Wham UK, flatulant Canadian superstars, Terrance and Phillip, have broken up over creative differences. The clock is ticking as the boys struggle to reunite the fartastic duo, and recruit them in time for South Park's Earth Day festivities.
David hires Donna, his lodger and the daughter of his best friend. While showing her round the office he discovers a doctored pornographic image of himself. Gareth, due to his covert operations skills, is told to catch the culprit.
The girls meet for lunch to catch up and Carrie reveals that she and Aidan have exchanged keys to each other's apartments. When Carrie goes home she's touched to find Aidan cooking in her never before used kitchen. She also discovers that her computer has crashed and she can't access any of her files. Aidan chastises her for not backing up her material. They bring her computer in to a repair shop and the techie tells her it doesn't look good. Miranda has to go to Philadelphia because her Mom has had a heart attack. The next day her Mom dies. Miranda calls Carrie to let her know and trying to be strong fights back tears. Charlotte, who has become a regular Martha Stewart, takes charge of getting the best funeral fruit basket and flower arrangement. Samantha has trouble dealing with the news of the death and can't bring herself to call Miranda. Instead, she gets together with her latest man, Nick, a NYU wrestling coach who had been teaching her new positions. However, this time, no matter what moves they try, Samantha can't orgasm. The next day, determined to get off, she pulls out her trusty vibrators but no luck. Miranda goes shopping for a funeral dress and after screaming at the lingerie saleswoman, she breaks down and cries in the woman's arms. Aidan surprises Carrie with a new laptop computer and zip drive but Carrie isn't happy about it. She's used to taking care of herself and can't handle the implications of his gesture. They argue and Aidan gives her back her keys. Back at the computer repair shop, Carrie learns that she needs her "motherboard" replaced. She calls Aidan and admits that she's scared to let him in, in case they fall apart. The girls go to the funeral in Philadelphia and offer Miranda their full support. In the middle of the funeral, Samantha starts crying and finds the release she really needed. She finally says, "I'm sorry" to Miranda. Back home, Carrie lets go of her fears and starts using the zip drive that Aidan gave her.
The family must persuade the angry brother of a war veteran who died of lung disease that his brother should receive a military-honoring burial.